It started out as a normal day… what is the meaning of life?

Normally we just amble in the pub and have a pint, or a dram, or both, havin the craik and watchin any sport on the telly. As we gathered we totalled four, meself, Ming, Billy and Angus. After the usual talk on nothing, we decided to have a wee dram session, thats where we started the trail doonhill … Singleton looked at us appealingly. Good, but not one I would chose first. Its the one I would hang first. BUT, saying that we had to start somewhere, and the left of the shelf seemed as good a place as any.

Bushmills

Singleton of Dufftown 12 year old; Golden colour with a rich nose of fruits, liquorice and citrus. The smooth taste leaves a warm and pleasant finish. Well, it went doon well, better than most blends, even though this is a single malt. We chatted and all agreed we had tasted better really, but y’know you need start with something unpeated, so we did. The telly was pretty boring, och after all is was only 1.30 on a drab and driech Saturday. Which led us to one of the best films ever made “Whisky Galore”. Believe me if ya havnee seen it, make it a first to do on the list tomorrow. Bushmills Liz likes hers in hot toddies! But – C’mon lads were in a pub, so we had 4 neat single malt Booshmills. Aye it went down well and even Angus didnee put water in it, amazin!!! It was aboot now that Gus started sliding, mind – he had been there the longest, he thought he could taste Leprachauns in his dram, we moved a chair to the left and he didnee notice, he was dreamin of wee Irish Coleens. We left him and took another dram, it was good, plus – even better, Shamrock Rovers had just qualified for the group stages in Europa League.

Monkey Shoulder

Next on the shelf was a fine looking Monkey Shoulder. Aye no a single malt, but this wasnee a malt tasting day, we were “exploring”. I have had this dram often and do really like it. 3 malts but cannee separate them, sweet, vanilla and fruit, slightly malty. I love the monkey’s on the bottle and the website! Ok its a Glenfiddich/Balvenie mostly but we all enjoyed them, even Gus who was back in the land of the living. It was now we heard bagpipes, so we though Fraz was comin in, wrong, nae sign of him. Turns out it was the pub cat, someone had squashed it in the door. Gus thought it was Highland cathedral, oh God he’s gone! Footy was on by noo and we took a wee breather, ciggie break for two of us, bathroom breaks all roond. Upon our re-gathering, someone mentioned the meaning of life … er, where did that come from? Ming had mentioned watchin it the night before, so – as you do – a Monty Python conversation broke out. After another Monkey we challenged eachother who could do the best “silly walk” as in Python. Billy fell over trying the famous John Cleese walk, Gus walked into the bar, Ming couldnee walk for lafin and myself; decided against it on medical grounds. We left Gus fallin asleep at the end of the bar. Might I just say, when we started, the pub was quiet, now it was busy, most folk seemed to think this was the entertainment for the afternoon. Och well we were oblivious to it. By noo it was tea time, so we decided to wake Gus and all have a healthy bite to eat to see us right. Pub food can be good; deep fried haggis and a link sausage roll with mashed tattie. We took this on the bar and hey, Gus woke up!!! Being sensible adults we decided to put a hold on the drams, 4 Irn Bru’s so it was.

Iron Bru

Nothin like a healthy meal to keep you young an fit. And that was nothin like a healthy meal. Next on the shelf was the Glenlivet. A standard pub dram and one I normally shy away from (I’m a very shy person) but we had one each. Did you know, it was the first distillery to be licensed to make Scotch whisky in 1824. The 12 year old is the one we supped. No bad, Nose fruity – hint of apple, light. Palate light, hint of citrus fruits. Comes and goes quickly. Not very complex in the mouth. Restless. It was around 8pm that Gus broke in that he thought he could see flying frogs behind the bar. Hell, the girls hair was no that bad! Time to move him over again. As Gus chatted away to himself, 2 policemen wandered in … 3 locals wandered out the back door for a smoke. I peeped back inside, I have never heard quiet so loud as that, we dinnee like bluebells in our pubs. Back in we went after they departed, to be sure we had another Irn Bru each. Around now I recall being hit with a camera, terrible so it was, still get flash backs! So to Peat; Connemara Peated Single Malt. The lovely Linda had given me a few bottles of this and one went to the pub, she worked at Cooley’s until recently. It was pretty smoky, hints of hazelnut and liquorice. Liz, God bless her can niff germaline. Grand stuff, though Billy and Ming diddnee like that much peat, so .. out came the hip flask. I had a weed dram in it; Glen Garioch from the old brown bottle. Needless to say this was all our favourite dram of the night, the hip flask soon was empty. By now we were all looking at Gus, who was still alseep and thought it no a bad idea! It was to be truthful, getting a wee bit hazy now. We agreed to end our tasting with a Wild Scotsman. My pal in USA, Jeff gave me two of these bottles, one is half drunk at home, the other is more than half drunk in the pub, we finished it for them. Its a blend and very nice it is too. We were woken up and asked to leave about midnight, Gus had mysteriously gone already.

Glen Garioch

So what IS the meaning of life? Answer; sittin doon with pals, browsing distilleries without leaving the pub, while enjoying good grub, nice pub staff and havin the craik.

Paul McLean

MCLEANSCOTLAND

www.mcleanscotland.com

and an ANGELS WHISKY CLUB special report

www.angelswhiskyclub.com